


text me now

by starimark



Category: NCT (Band), WAYV
Genre: Falling Out of Love, M/M, angst ??
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-21
Updated: 2020-08-21
Packaged: 2021-03-07 01:33:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,328
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26018845
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starimark/pseuds/starimark
Summary: falling out of love hurts
Relationships: Mark/Hendery, markdery
Comments: 10
Kudos: 23





	text me now

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by youngk's text me now :D totally not writing my feelings out haha (the vibes of this are different from the song tho...)  
> twitter: @starimark  
> small warning: this is not beta'd btw so :/  
> lets gooooo to those 4 markdery(?) ppl

They met at a bookstore three years ago.

A little bookstore called Blooming, hidden in the busy streets of Seoul. It’s squeezed in between an antique store and a flower shop. Pink little sakura petals scattered around the shop’s name and two flowers to accumulate the double ‘o’. Located four blocks from the University, just passed a line of tall pine trees. 

Walking in, there stands at least eight rows of shelves filled with books of all kinds. Towards the end, a little cafe. Simple but so very cozy. 

The owner of the store was a guy named Nakamoto Yuta. Apparently it was a family owned business and he was newly appointed to handling the store whist his parents retired to Japan. Yuta had grown especially fond of the younger boy. His shy nature and love for books deemed him impossible to resist. 

Mark frequented that bookstore every wednesday morning the moment he accidentally stumbled upon it. That rainy day was the start of his routine. It became a second home to him, a place where ideas roam free. Every book on the dusty shelf had its own unique story to tell the world. He hoped one day, he’d be able to create his own stories and share them with others. 

He really hoped taking some art and design classes were a good choice to make that dream a reality. Mark already published his own little comic story on those free platforms and hope he can live off of his patreon money. A broke college student with a barely paying minimum wage job drawing comics for a living? He sure did play himself. Even if it didn’t work out, he can always join that nursing program his parents have been bugging him about. 

On that particular day, Mark went to the bookstore in the late afternoon. 

His class ended late, being midterms and all. He quickly gathered all his stuff, carelessly shoving them into his old worn out Jan sport backpack that seemed to be fading its black color. He took one last look at his final project before scampering towards the door. Mark left his class with a tiny sigh of relief and headed towards his place of comfort. 

Like any other day, the sun shined brightly overhead with little to no clouds beside it. 

Mark can still recall the smell of new books that Yuta had just ordered, the nutty with a bit of honey coffee aroma and the sweet vanilla scent that bounced off of the wide eyed man. 

Messy long dark brown hair underneath a purple cap, brown eyes that sparkled brighter than the sun. This person made the plain white shirt and black jeans look so expensive. 

His hands were hovering over the stranger’s hand as they both reached for the latest edition of haikyuu. 

What Mark experienced came off of a scene from a shoujo manga. Where the main protagonist meets a potential love interest. He almost felt like the background transformed into that of flowers and small hearts. 

He half expected for an anime opening to occur. 

“Ah, sorry!” Mark pulled back his hand to his chest as if the simple touch burned. 

The stranger smiled, so sweet and innocent. “You like haikyuu too?” 

He felt his ears warm up from the simple question. It wasn’t like Mark was ashamed of liking these sort of things, it was more of ‘wow this hot guy likes Haikyuu too and he’s not shaming me about it!’ 

Ever since then, Hendery always made sure to greet Mark with a smile.

And every time he did, Mark’s heart soared. 

•••

_HmmHmm_

> **from Hendery**
> 
> :) 
> 
> yo let me borrow your chem notes 
> 
> slept during lecture again
> 
> [SENT: 3:10pm] ∨

> **from Mark**
> 
> this is the tenth time omg 
> 
> are you getting enough rest dude??
> 
> [SENT: 3:12pm]∨

> **from Hendery**
> 
> :))) 
> 
> no <3
> 
> just an excuse to see youuuu 
> 
> <3 
> 
> [SENT: 3:13pm] ∨

> **from Mark**
> 
> idiot
> 
> im bringing some tea 
> 
> it helps me sleep , you could use it 
> 
> [SENT: 3:14pm]∨

•••

“What’s with the smiley face text everyday?” Mark asked, picking up a book and scanning it. 

‘Introduction to poses’ it read. He sighed while remembering his professor lecturing him on how his character poses looked unnatural. 

The only thing unnatural is that mustache of his that seemed to be defying gravity. 

Hendery looked at him all flustered. “Oh. Just a way to let you know I’m thinking about you. You know, sending good vibes to you since you get stress a lot.”

Mark ended up choking on his own spit, face growing red. He still can’t get used to his bold and blunt personality. Hendery was so endearingly honest about his emotions. 

“haa…you send them frequently to me..” Mark replied softly, rubbing his forearm. “Actually you text me everyday. Like _a lot_ ” 

Mark had friends but even his friends didn’t text him every hour of the day to ask random questions or send a variation of different smiley faces. He didn’t mind it. It was Hendery after all. 

Hendery blinked, a slow realization growing inside him. 

“Oh, is it too much?” Biting his lips and thinking his actions might scare Mark off. “I guess texting you something weird at 6am does seem...” His eyes looking everywhere but the boy next to him. 

Before he can think too deep about it, Hendery saw Mark throw his head back. Bubbles of giggles escaped his mouth and a light blush coated his cheeks. 

“You don’t have to think so hard about it, it’s honestly kinda flattering.” Mark grinned at him. 

•••

_HmmHmm_

> **from Kunhang**
> 
> heyyyy
> 
> ;)
> 
> [SENT:7:36pm]∨ 

> **from Mark**
> 
> hey! I have the next book
> 
> to the trilogy series you
> 
> wanted to read!
> 
> [SENT 7:38pm] ∨

> **from Kunhang**
> 
> :) 
> 
> oh thankssss ^3^ 
> 
> also wanna go out ^-^
> 
> [SENT 7:40pm]∨ 

> **from Mark**
> 
> typing... 

> **from** Kunhang
> 
> umm...
> 
> youve been typing for a while
> 
> please reject me nicely 
> 
> my heart is too soft :(
> 
> [SENT 8:08pm]∨ 

> **from Mark**
> 
> OK 
> 
> WAOT NO I MEAN 
> 
> yeah I’ll go out 
> 
> with you ...
> 
> does this mean you like me?? 
> 
> [SENT: 8:10pm] ∨ 

> **from Kunhang**
> 
> yes! :D 
> 
> I really really really 
> 
> like you!!
> 
> also wanna hold your hand ;-;
> 
> [SENT: 8:12pm]∨ 

> **from Mark**
> 
> I like you too
> 
> and yeah same here :)
> 
> [SENT: 8:13pm] ∨

•••

Right after college, Mark’s comic started gaining popularity fast. And by fast, it means getting at least one million reads each chapter. It wasn’t even formally published. This was all Mark ever dreamed of. Drawing his heart out and sharing them to so many people. It didn’t take long for someone to reach out to him. Mark was in the big leagues now, making a name for himself. 

Parallel Lives followed the story of two people in love. A story about a crumpling relationship on its way towards an unhappy ending. 

Totally different from the types of genre Mark would usually read about. 

Hendery also got to venture into his own dream: working his way up to get his name known in the business world. Trying to slow down the corruption of this world. Or so he hoped to accomplish... but that won’t stop him from giving it his all. The hard working and kind hearted man the world needs. 

•••

_HmmHmm_

> **from Kunhang**
> 
> babe do a cameo of me in your manga!! 
> 
> the worlds gotta see my hotness ;) 
> 
> [SENT:12:38pm]∨

> **from Mark**
> 
> haha no 
> 
> i love you but 
> 
> no 
> 
> [SENT:12:40pm]∨

> **from Kunhang**
> 
> but :( 
> 
> [SENT:12:41pm]∨

> **from Mark**
> 
> no 
> 
> [SENT:12:43pm]∨

> **from Kunhang**
> 
> :( 
> 
> [SENT: 12:44pm]∨

> **from Mark**
> 
> fine
> 
> [SENT:12:45PM]∨

> **from Kunhang**
> 
> :) 
> 
> [SENT:12:45pm]∨

•••

Mark’s eyes wandered to his phone messages. His blue text overpowering Hendery’s grey ones. It’s been like this for almost four months now. Mark knew during this time of year, Hendery’s job took him in for more hours but something about his text feel so sad and hollow.

It didn’t take long for him not to respond at all.

Even a simple smiley face, a smiley face that he would send everyday, would make this feeling of his heart sinking better. Since they started going out, Hendery always made sure to send one for the morning and one for the night, just to show that he’s thinking about him. 

It’s so different.

All the time in the world they had in college seemed like a dream. 

Maybe it’s selfish of Mark to think that Hendery would always need to have time for him. Thinking about it, Mark was also to blame. He wasn’t exactly the best at communicating when deadlines stacked against deadlines were due within the same time frame. But honestly he’s trying, really trying to break that habit. So far, Mark wants to say it’s going well on his part.

As for Hendery… well it’s complicated. 

He seemed very distant lately. The days where they both were in the same space, would lessen day by day. Relationships are hard and love itself takes on a whole new meaning. It’s not always butterflies and that spark. Mark knew this but actually living it… it’s so frightening. 

Love is so messy and chaotic. Like how it’s not just one emotion, it’s a lot tangled together. What makes love so fascinating is how people are willing to work together to detangle them in their own ways to make it last. Did they get so tangled up that there wasn’t any way to break from this suffocation? 

He solemnly scrolled through his feed. Every so often, he’d click on the smiling profile of Hendery and stare at his account. 

Mark missed him. 

•••

_HmmHmm_

> **from Mark**
> 
> don’t forget to eat!! 
> 
> let’s eat pizza when you finish 
> 
> <3
> 
> [SENT: 9:20pm] ∨ 

> **from Kunhang**
> 
> ok
> 
> [SENT: 7:22am]∨ 

•••

When did being by the person you really love become so empty and cold. 

Hendery spent the whole night researching why, why, _why_. There was nothing wrong with Mark. Nothing about his whole person ever annoyed him. Mark was the ideal boyfriend. He still found him very attractive. His jokes, corny, never failed to make him laugh. 

So why..

does it feel like the end?

It wasn’t fair. He’s the one to deepen their friendship, the one who took the chance to get to know Mark better. The one who decided to take their friendship to the next level. He’s the one who shouldn’t be thinking this. Hendery hated how replying back felt difficult so it resulted in not answering most the the time. The air was stiff and unbearable each time he was alone with Mark these days. The worse part of it all, this feeling slowly built itself unknowingly. 

When did that spark between them start to dim? It felt like Mark was the only one coming up with multiple ideas on how to light it back up while Hendery watched from the sidelines. 

Is this honeymoon phase over? Is he willing to stick around and fight for these three years of love they built? 

He doesn’t know. But there’s one thing for sure, Mark is someone very dear to him. 

Did he meet the right person at the wrong time? Who knows.

Hendery felt the vibration of his phone. Pulling it out, he noticed a link that Mark sent him. He sadly smiled before hitting send at his short message.

Mark successfully started his debut comic. He was called into a mini interview once the first half of his work had finished. Hendery clicked on the link and listened to Mark answer each question with passion. He’s so well spoken. 

“One last question Mr. Lee. What do you want your readers to take away from Parallel Lives?”

”What I want them to take away… Um.. A lot of things to be honest. I want them to see that love isn’t just a feeling. It’s so many things at once.” 

Hendery nodded in agreement and lightly chuckled. “Mark that’s so deep.” 

“It kinda sounds dark but love isn’t always going to lead to a happy ending. It’s a very complex thing despite it being such a simple term.”

“Even the ones that seem healthy and happy can lead to a sad ending if not enough effort is put into it.” 

•••

_HmmHmm_

> **from Mark**
> 
> wanna binge watch teen titans? 
> 
> i bought all the seasons!!
> 
> and no it’s not the reboot 
> 
> [SENT: 5:55pm]∨ 

•••

Long agonizing hours later, Hendery decided it was for the best to end it all. Their lives are far too busy, his life was far too busy. It wouldn’t be fair for Mark to just pour all his heart out when the effort is one sided. 

“Mark, I think we should break up.” Hendery said with a flat tone.

Mark’s smile faltered, his face confused. “W-what do you mean..?” 

Hendery couldn’t meet his eyes. He knew, just knew if he stared into those warm brown eyes, the guilt would worsen. He knew the light in Mark’s eyes would disappear, the way they started already glistening broke his heart a little. 

But he can’t. He can’t face a heart broken Mark. 

However, he can’t keep lying. To himself or the person he loved. 

“I mean we should end this, end us.” Hendery slowly said, watching his fist ball up. 

“We can take a break! You know space since we’re so busy and-“

”Mark-“

”I-I’ll go on hiatus and clear my schedule more often. Maybe even convince Kun to give you some time off!”

”Please Mark, I-”

”If it’s about texting me everyday, you don’t have to! I’ll know you still think about me without the text. We’re adults after all, he don’t need to be texting all the time like teenagers.” Mark strained a laugh, rubbing the back of his neck. His legs were visibly shaking with nervousness. 

He doesn’t want to let go, not when he’s spend the majority his college days loving him to the fullest. 

“Mark...I don’t want to keep giving you false hope.” Hendery gripped his coffee cup, the hotness burning his palms. “You deserve everything good in this world, all the happiness and joy. I can’t give you those things.” 

“Kunhang, why.” Mark’s eyes held so many emotions swimming inside them. The most prominent ones were desperation and denial. 

He didn’t exactly know the full reason to why. Just bits of pieces and even those pieces didn’t give him a good answer. 

Hendery stared at his coffee, the small flower drawing the barista made, destroyed and gone. “You aren’t my top priority anymore and I can’t see a future with us anymore. At least not in a romantic way.”

Blinking away tears, Mark furrowed his eyebrows. “Did I do something wrong? If it’s something I did then I can change-”

“You didn’t do anything wrong Mark! Nothing at all.” Hendery hated how his voice cracked. It’d be easier if Mark had done something like cheated or pretended to like him. 

But Mark only has love in that body of his. 

Sighing, he exhaled a deep breath. Maybe trying once again will help. Yeah, he’ll do his best to rekindle the flame. 

Taking back everything he said, Hendery smiled weakly at Mark. “I’ll put in more effort for us, Mark.” Hendery promised, squeezing Mark’s hand to reassure him. 

After all, love takes two, not one. 

•••

_HmmHmm_

> **from Mark**
> 
> hey, are you coming? 
> 
> ordered your usual 
> 
> [SENT 1:12pm] 

•••

Mark felt a kick to his ankle. He cried out and glared at Lucas who sat across from him. “What the fuck?” Donghyuck who sat beside him, stifled a laugh. 

“I’m pretty sure it’s kinda rude to be on your phone when you’re on a bro date.” Lucas deadpanned as he took fries from Mark’s plastic tray. 

He was right. Mark spent the last two hours constantly checking his phone. Every ding was just met with disappointment and bitterness. Lucas had to pry his phone out his hands to keep him from getting distracted but to no avail. 

Huffing through his nose, Mark rolled his eyes. “I’m third wheeling you and Hyuck right now.. this is past a bro date.” 

Donghyuck shot his friend a sad but hesitant smile. “It’s suppose to be a double date…” 

Mark resisted the urge to glare at him. Instead he directed his glare at his half eaten burger. He didn’t feel like eating at all. 

“You’re more grumpy than usual. What’s wrong dude?” Lucas crossed his arms, staring deeply into Mark’s eyes. “Aside from your date bailing on you.” 

Ouch.

Mark looked away, playing with the straw from his drink. He took a peek at the untouched food next to his, getting cold and stale after two hours. He could lie and say he’s fine but Lucas had a keen eye for these things. If anything, he’d pester him until Mark cracked. 

“Kunhang hasn’t called or texted back. I’m just waiting in case he does.” Mark crossed his arms onto the table and laid his head down on them with an evident pout forming. 

Hope was the only thing keeping him going at this point. 

“God that-“ 

_HmmHmm_

Jumping in his seat, Mark felt the vibration of his phone go off once again. He held out a finger with an apologetic smile while Lucas rolled his eyes. His body instantly responded and his hands flew to his screen to unlock it. 

A tired sigh escaped his lips as he stared at the name. The grip on his drink tightened angrily. Another notification popped up on his screen besides the text. 

A reminder from his editor that his next chapter is due in a few days. His chair screeched the floor abruptly as Mark stood up to go home. He was done. Before he got the chance to go past them, Donghyuck caught his arm to prevent him from leaving. 

“Mark hey, maybe he’s busy, I’m sure he’ll make it up.” Donghyuck hesitated, nudging his boyfriend next to him. “Xuxi will make sure to talk to him, right?” Lucas nodded in response. 

“Busy my ass. He just posted a picture on instagram.” And with that Mark stormed off, tears threatening to fall and the calls of his friends falling to deaf ears. 

Frustrating. So frustrating. 

The moment Mark got home, he kicked off his shoes and slammed the door shut. He stormed into his room where he spent the remaining hours of the day under his blankets crying and yelling into a huge penguin plush pillow. 

Maybe crying up till 2am wasn’t such a bright idea. It only made Mark sadder with the occasional burst of anger. 

Mark stood up from his bed to walk over to his phone that he dropped near his bedroom door. “Tch, what’re doing that you can’t even message back, idiot..” He muttered while picking it up. 

Nothing. Mark managed a shaky smile, sinking to the floor while his phone fell onto the floor. Burying his head into his hands, Mark sat there all alone and eventually cried to sleep with his back on his bedroom wall. 

By the time he opened his eyes, it was late afternoon. Mark did what he always does when he wakes up, check his phone for any sort of notifications. 

Maybe he left something during dawn. He always did. 

That tiny light of desperate hope lingered in his heart. 

At last he sighed and grabbed his hair, frustrated at Hendery, himself, the world, anything he can direct his anger towards. For the final time, he grabbed his phone and unlocked it. 

No notifications, again. 

He caught a glimpse his reflection on the blackened screen. Eyes swollen, face puffy and his hair a mess. 

Maybe it was time to face reality. 

Tossing his phone to the floor, he walked to his bed and buried himself deeper into the mattress, hoping to be swallowed up. Mark did his best to blink the tears away but ended up sniffing on his already damp pillowcase. 

He’ll be okay. Everything will be okay. But not today.

•••

_HmmHmm_

> **from Mark**
> 
> yeah…
> 
> let’s end it 
> 
> [SENT: 5:27am] 

•••

**Author's Note:**

> haa.. is this angst?? idk i hope yall liked it or at least enjoyed it !! this is my first fic for nct/wayv !! thank you so much for reading !!! sorry for any mistakes!!  
> twitter: @starimark


End file.
